He said it was a one night stand

Jul 27

(Source: 1los, via poke-problems)

psychofactz:

More Facts on Psychofacts :)
Jul 27

psychofactz:

More Facts on Psychofacts :)

carriesfirstperiod:

my mom just looked at a spider at our kitchen and yelled “why do you have to be like that? you dont need that many eyes or legs you need to stop”

(Source: lmpossibleprincess, via thathilariousasian)

Jul 27
Jul 27

(Source: patrickkingart, via hashtagugly)

Jul 27

(Source: tastefullyoffensive, via hashtagugly)

thejunglenook:

ballpointpun:

Somewhere a rocket scientist brain surgeon physicist with a knack for economics who wears Velcro shoes is having a stress breakdown.

When I was a professional ballroom dance instructor, one of my coworkers was having a tough time teaching a step to her student. As he gets more frustrated she tells him “it’s ok- you’ll get it- this isn’t rocket science.”
There is an awkward pause as her student stares back at her."No" he agrees, "this isn’t rocket science. That I can do. This is some sadistic step designed specifically to torture rocket scientists.”
And that’s how we found out he worked for NASA.
Jul 27

thejunglenook:

ballpointpun:

Somewhere a rocket scientist brain surgeon physicist with a knack for economics who wears Velcro shoes is having a stress breakdown.

When I was a professional ballroom dance instructor, one of my coworkers was having a tough time teaching a step to her student. As he gets more frustrated she tells him “it’s ok- you’ll get it- this isn’t rocket science.”

There is an awkward pause as her student stares back at her.
"No" he agrees, "this isn’t rocket science. That I can do. This is some sadistic step designed specifically to torture rocket scientists.”

And that’s how we found out he worked for NASA.

(Source: oldresidentdistrict, via hashtagugly)

jordosross:

nickandjades-infinitelaughter:

Me as a parent


"This is why dad left"
Jul 27

jordosross:

nickandjades-infinitelaughter:

Me as a parent

"This is why dad left"

(via thathilariousasian)

Jul 27

(Source: pleatedjeans, via thathilariousasian)

Jul 27

callmeoutis:

i was ready to just scroll past like “haha grammar humor” but then it was weird al and i,

(Source: iraffiruse, via joshpeck)

Jul 27

(Source: xoxstarlight, via tyleroakley)